Sunday, December 20, 2009

Christmas Thoughts

Everyone is pretty excited around here. I truly cannot believe that Christmas is just five days away. I remember this time last year... we knew of three siblings in Ethiopia but had not seen their faces nor knew their names. I thought often of what this Christmas would be like, and now it is here.

I debated on sharing this, but feel it is a common adoption issue from everything we have read and studied. The girls had a little bit of difficulty during the week prior to their birthday party. We really think the "hype" of birthdays in America, the excitement and anticipation was a little too much and sent them into somewhat of an emotional over load. The day after the party was over everything seemed to settle back down, emotions calmed and behavior improved.

With the twins' birthday experience, we are trying to approach Christmas as simply as possible. For example, I usually have all the gifts wrapped and under the tree by now but think we'll hold off a few more days. As boring as it sounds, planning and structure have been the best tool Dustin and I have used during these days of adjustment. We were advised by our adoption caseworkers how important structure would be to the lives of our new kids, and they were so right! Trying to anticipate responses to new situations and unexpected changes, although sometimes impossible to do, really does help all of us. I can't say it is easy, though, because this goes totally against the grain of the hustle and bustle of daily life in America, not to mention the revved up pace of the holidays. We want to avoid meltdowns at all cost so that all of our kids can have the best Christmas and have great memories of this special time of year. We look forward to the future when we can all feel more comfortable and can be less structured, but for now it works.

We're all pretty excited to have a few days off and celebrate the birth of our Savior as a new and bigger family. The kids like to tell us of Christmas in Ethiopia and of Mariam (Mary) and Escabior (Jesus.) Their little accents sound so sweet and beautiful. In spite of the challenges and adjustment of life as a bigger family there is a different feel and dynamic to the preparations of Christmas this year. It's good. Some things are more difficult but the big picture is so much brighter, richer and deeper with Corinne, Ellyn and Turner in our lives.


Robin said...

OH Nikki..I just loved this post and the picture is fabulous! Squeeker had a birthday end of November; mine was yesterday. We've had HUGE issues with birthdays with one of our newest since he has yet to have one. Setting expectations is so key for them. Honestly, I can't wait for the season to be over -- it's been so difficult as I feel somewhat we've returned to the early days when we first got home. Pray for us...especially me, as my nerves are fried this season!

beBOLDjen said...

BEAUTIFUL family and beautiful Christmas card. Merry Christmas.

Kristine said...

Merry Christmas Nikki!!! Love you girl.

Loved your card. It is absolutely beautiful.

Rebecca said...

Love the Christmas card!

I love that you guys are doing what's best for the kiddos - even though it's not always the easy thing to do. You have such a sweet family!

Kristy -Mom To 6 Blessings said...

Love your post! Grace is the same way! Her brother had a big birthday party this year and it threw her off for days! I, too, have hesitated putting presents under the tree this year. Just so much going on. She also does not do well at all with a change in her sleep pattern or with the liberty to eat what and how much she wants. (She always overeats, feels yucky, has a stomach ache. We try to use this to teach her to make better choices when Mom & Dad aren't around. She has a New Years Eve sleepover with a chocoalte fountain and I'm already worried! :-)

Anonymous said...

Nikki, what an amazing and challenging experience for everyone involved! Love you guys! - Cara (missed having the reunion at the Canna Farm, but I am so glad you guys had better things to do! )

Amy C said...
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Nikki said...

What a great photo- so happy for your family!