Long Post Warning!
I have a to-do list a mile long, school is canceled tomorrow because of today's ice storm, the dog needs to be fed, but all I really want to do is put into writing what happened this morning.
For a little background: When we started the adoption process last June we saw a little boy on Gladney's Bright Futures page. Even though Gladney is changing some things about older child adoptions, previously they posted several pictures of older Ethiopian children on their site. During one of initial phone calls with Gladney, we were even given a little bit of this boy's information. He was/is a doll! The funny thing was, I was not drawn to him like I expected to be. I think we even pictured ourselves adopting a son, but something in my heart paused, not allowing my feelings to grow for this sweet thing. It really puzzled me, because this was totally out of character for me. We knew it would be several months before we were approved, so we chose to keep this little guy in mind and just see what happened.
Fast-forward to November. We were nearing wait list status and still had this eight year old boy on our minds. Not knowing if we were to pursue his adoption or not, we decided to call our caseworker and see if he was still available. If he wasn't, then that would answer our question. I sent Mary an email inquiring on a Thursday afternoon. I got an email from her on Friday and she asked if we could visit by phone the following Tuesday. Ugh! I would have to wait a whole weekend to find our answer!
Mary called on Tuesday and I proceeded to ask her about the sweet boy. She said she had a little something different she wanted to discuss. Because older children are harder to place she had an unusual circumstance. She continued by saying that three siblings were available and would we be interested? I was stunned. My immediate, down deep reaction was, "Yes!" But of course, I had to call Dustin. I thought I knew what his response would be, but I certainly had to ask him first. She was only able to share the gender and ages and other than that we would have to wait the normal time frame to be offered an official referral. Our homestudy only approved us for one or two children, so we would have to re-do some of our paperwork if we wanted to pursue the three siblings. If we were not interested in adopting three children, then we could continue as planned.
Dustin's immediate "yes" response confirmed what I felt in my heart. Our paperwork was updated for three children and then we had to just wait. We were officially on the waitlist on January 7th. On January 21st, Dustin and I were getting in bed and were talking how long we thought the wait would be before we could find out more information about the siblings. I told Dustin I would give it until the middle of March before I would start "harassing" Mary for information!
To our total surprise, Mary called the next day with the referral and we finally got to see three beautiful faces, Y, M and H. We knew immediately that these were the children God had planned for us. I realized why I had the pause in my heart for the 8 year old boy. While I pray a family scoops him up, I knew the siblings were the reason God had not allowed my heart to fall for him.
Our last post announced our referral and we have been overwhelmed by comments on the blog, on facebook, by email and phone calls. The adoption blog community is truly amazing! One of the first comments came from coffeemom. She thought she may have met the twins when she was in Ethiopia last May adopting her sweet Gabriel. I sent her our referral picture to see if she recognized them. Yep, she had fallen for the twins and shared several photos with us! What a blessing. And since I hate filing through a mass of photos, I thought she was such an angel to offer to do this for us. Coffeemom sent the pictures in a few separate emails, but it looked as if I didn't receive all that she sent. I was happy nonetheless and didn't dare want to be presumptuous and ask, "Was that all?" So I didn't. At least not for two days.
Then I got to thinking. If these are some of the only pictures we will have of the kids before they are adopted, it is o.k. to ask. And coffeemom, being an adoptive mother herself, will surely understand. So I sent an email last night asking if she had originally sent more than the four emails I received last week.
I opened my email this morning, and sure enough, there were three more emails with pictures that she sent, but for some reason didn't get to me. And one of those emails included coffeemom writing about meeting Y, M and H and how she fell for the kids (not realizing they were siblings) and especially fond of Y. In fact, coffeemom was so taken with Y that she inquired about her last June (the same month we started the adoption process) to she if she was available. When she found out that Y had two siblings, coffeemom said she was heartbroken that they could not adopt three more kids. She began praying for the kids, wondering if anyone would ever adopt three older siblings.
Looking back, I believe God was orchestrating details and events that would bring Y, M and H to our family. There was a reason why I didn't become emotionally attached to the first little boy last June. God was preparing our hearts for these sibilings. Coffeemom was praying for them. We were praying for our children that we didn't know yet. We were praying for God to show us if we were to adopt a little boy, or did He have other plans for us? Had I hesitated to ask for the remaining pictures from coffeemom, I don't think I would have ever known this part of the story. And coffeemom would have thought I received the emails and didn't comment. So glad I asked!
I expressed my surprise to someone the other day about how God showed Himself in a situation. My friend told me, "Honey, why are you so surprised? We pray to the same God!"
I was reminded of these words today when this story unfolded. We pray to the same God and He is Wonderful. I thank Him for allowing us to see glimpses of His hand in our lives and in our adoption process.
"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out - plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." Jeremiah 29:11 (MSG)
